Day 30: I am Thankful for Depression

"Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, 

as though something strange were happening to you."  1 Peter 4:12 ESV

Peter wrote his letter to young Christians experiencing persecution intense enough to cause them to be uprooted from their homes and displaced into another community.  He writes to encourage them that their sufferings will have the great result of making them holy.  Trials will purify them.  Trials will make them more like the Jesus they love. 

As an American, I have never really suffered for my faith, beyond a few snide comments thrown my way.  So, how does God purify me, here, in my day, in my community?  How does He make me holy?

Depression is suffering.  To those who have never suffered with mental illness, it can seem pitiful and pathetic, and I understand why.  But the fact is, one can be surrounded by luxury and be immersed in hell.  I really think it is one of the closest experiences to what hell will really be like for those who are cut off from Christ forever.  

And I am so super blessed to have suffered from depression.  

God has used my depression.  He has purified me.  He has made me more holy.  He has made me different.  He has made me more like Him.  Because I am more like Him, I can serve more like He serves.  I can be generous.  I can be merciful.  I can love others like He does.  

If it wasn't for my years of bondage, I wouldn't be starting on the path to study biblical counseling and psychology.  I am going to start working with YoungLife, loving on teenage mothers and blessing them as they make the "harder" choice.  

None of my current or future blessings would occur if I had not traveled dark paths.  

I can say that even though it would be awful, I would be willing to go through it again to see the blessing that God has on the other side.  If I ever go through depression again, I will know that He is again making me more holy.  

"Therefore let those who suffer according to God's will entrust their souls 

to a faithful Creator while doing good."  1 Peter 4:19 ESV (emphasis added)

I love this song.  The verse, especially, summarizes all my thoughts toward depression: 

I am thankful for depression.  

My future is by no means done, but I am done, talking about depression, for now...